8.26.2002

The current mood of kinetic66@yahoo.com at www.imood.com

Mr. Smarty Pants has been absent of late.....and for this....my apologies. I guess in part it's due to the motorbike which has been quite literally an escape. I shall define this. A motorbike is solitary as is usually the rider. It exposes you to the elements...every sound and smell, moisture and dust, every element. It has no cd player or radio and forces you to carry whatever you need on your person. So you get into the habit of carrying the basic necessities...and being satisfied with them. The motorbike demands your attention clutch at the left hand, brake and throttle on the right, brake on the right foot and gearshifter on the left.....every extremity has a job to while the eyes and ears scan the area for danger and all this while maintaining your balance on 2 wheels. Not to mention...people treat you differently...people who rarely or never spoke to me all of a sudden are speaking to me. An old Pakistani guy who lives in my building stood by me smoking a cigarrette watching me polish the bike after a rain. One guy walking down the street downtown stopped for a good 3 minutes watching me warm up the bike and nodding his approval to me as i passed (how wierd is that..?) Little kids stare at me....oh i forgot...little kids always stared at me...just now it's kind of a dazed stare as opposed to a dumb stare. There is a difference ya know. Oh yes....it is a distraction indeed....i forgot to mention the sweet sound the engine makes with acceleration.....
Thusfar i havent hit anything or caused any explosions which is cool....and i take the "long" way to and from work and do silly stuff like ride to the Bronx for seafood or Brooklyn for pizza.....or to umm...Blockbuster in Astoria.
Work is good. Uneventful at the hospital...but after 9/11 a street riot might only raise an eyebrow or two and a double murder is usually preceded in the news by the term "but on a lighter note...."
And as for the world....it's still quite fucked up. I won't even go there tonite or it'll spoil my mood. Mr. Smarty Pants has a new pet peeve.....i am boycotting the "Today" show on NBC. And i should have done this a very long time ago. Why do i do this you ask..??? Because the pinheads on that show try to pass themselves off as journalists when in fact they are nothing more than soap opera stars doing a news skit where even the witticisms are scripted. My god...!!! they interview world leaders on a whim..!! Now...i know what your thinking...."...But Mr. Smarty Pants.....all tv news programs are like that...." Yes...i know this. But all the other news shows know they are full of shit or at least admit to the fact that they are really there to entertain....but the "Today" show has incredible influence on American opinion..enough influence to to create "American Heroes" or to destroy the lives and reputations of the great and the meek alike.....all whilst appealing to the lowest common denominator. So please...join me in boycotting the "Today" show. Remember...the Today show outsucks an Electrolux.
And as for my personal life...(sound of crickets chirping in darkness......image of tumbleweeds rolling along a parched landscape in a dry whistling wind.....) my personal life has been quiet. Mr. Smarty Pants sometimes finds himself missing the company of an intelligent mature woman. Sometimes even a stupid mature woman would do. In the least she would have to be a woman or hopefully resemble one. Worse comes to worse i'll buy a ferret or a pet Tarantula.
Oh...big news....i'm wearing contact lenses now. Kinda freaky. I keep reaching to take off my glasses and i almost poked my eye out several times. Today i lost one of the lenses for several hours...apparently it had slipped behind my right upper eyelid back into the cerebral cortex. The fact that i was thinking a bit more clearly made me suspicious and of course i was correct in my conclusion as to the whereabouts of this particular lens. But using a Martha Stewart website i was able to create a device that allowed me to retrieve this lens without incident or unnecessary embarassment. (fyi...glasses are uncomfortable in a full face helmet)
Well until next time....

"Stay Frosty" (Aliens 1986.....they don't make 'em like this anymore.....)